{"id":285,"date":"2007-09-30T14:30:27","date_gmt":"2007-09-30T14:30:27","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/juliencoquet.wordpress.com\/2007\/08\/21\/285\/"},"modified":"2007-09-30T14:30:27","modified_gmt":"2007-09-30T14:30:27","slug":"285","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/juliencoquet.com\/fr\/2007\/09\/30\/285\/","title":{"rendered":"Chronique du voyageur – Chapitre 7"},"content":{"rendered":"

Dans le Train \u00e0 Grande Vitesse<\/strong><\/p>\n

D\u00e8s l\u2019annonce du num\u00e9ro de voie, une foule de passagers \u2013 sans doute stress\u00e9s par les pigeons les prenant comme cible pour leurs fientes \u2013 se ruent vers le train, non sans avoir au pr\u00e9alable compost\u00e9 leur billet.<\/p>\n

Pas la peine de courir, le train part dans 25 minutes\u2026<\/p>\n

Pas moyen de n\u00e9gocier, c\u2019est \u00e0 qui bourrera sa valise dans la figure de son voisin le plus vite et le plus violemment possible.<\/p>\n

Commencent alors les n\u00e9gociations entre les passagers qui voyagent en couple et marchandent deux si\u00e8ges c\u00f4te \u00e0 c\u00f4te \u00e0 une personne qui ne peut pas vraisemblablement refuser sans passer pour le dernier des connards.<\/p>\n

\u00a0\u00bb J\u2019ai pay\u00e9 ma place!!
\n– Oui Monsieur, comme tout le monde.\u00a0\u00bb<\/p><\/blockquote>\n

Le train part doucement de la gare. Deux minutes plus tard, message d\u2019annonce du chef de cabine sous ecstasy et\/ou valium.<\/p>\n

Parfois on tombe sur un d\u00e9pressif\/suicidaire qui met un peu trop de z\u00e8le \u00e0 oblit\u00e9rer votre billet lors du passage de contr\u00f4le.<\/p>\n

Parfois on tombe sur un gars sympa curieusement anti-st\u00e9r\u00e9o typique : il fait tout pour vous arranger !<\/p>\n

Ce soir, je suis tomb\u00e9 sur un sosie de G\u00e9rard Darmon. Plus vrai que nature ! Il est sous Prozac + exta.
\nA moins que \u00e7\u00e0 soit la perspective de sa pr\u00e9-retraite. Il manie le \u00ab Messieurs-Dames, bonsoir ! \u00bb \u00e0 la perfection !<\/p>\n

Message encore plus surr\u00e9aliste du tenancier de la voiture bar. La compagnie des Wagons-Lits. Je r\u00e9prime \u00e0 chaque fois un sourire face \u00e0 cet anachronisme.<\/p>\n

S\u00e9rieusement, il serait temps de changer d\u2019\u00e9poque. Et de tarifs.
\n8 euros le jambon-beurre lyophilis\u00e9, non merci.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Dans le Train \u00e0 Grande Vitesse D\u00e8s l\u2019annonce du num\u00e9ro de voie, une foule de passagers \u2013 sans doute stress\u00e9s par les pigeons les prenant comme cible pour leurs fientes \u2013 se ruent vers le train, non sans avoir au pr\u00e9alable compost\u00e9 leur billet. Pas la peine de courir, le train part dans 25 minutes\u2026 […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_locale":"fr_FR","_original_post":"","footnotes":""},"categories":[],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-285","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","fr-FR"],"yoast_head":"\nChronique du voyageur - Chapitre 7 - Julien Coquet<\/title>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/juliencoquet.com\/fr\/2007\/09\/30\/285\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"fr_FR\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"Chronique du voyageur - Chapitre 7 - Julien Coquet\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"Dans le Train \u00e0 Grande Vitesse D\u00e8s l\u2019annonce du num\u00e9ro de voie, une foule de passagers \u2013 sans doute stress\u00e9s par les pigeons les prenant comme cible pour leurs fientes \u2013 se ruent vers le train, non sans avoir au pr\u00e9alable compost\u00e9 leur billet. 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